A couple of years ago, I was mad about this girl. The encounter with her made my life a lot easier. I even used a deformed version of her name as my login password for various websites.
But I didn't understand the nature of her job. She was like a fisherman. No matter how long you work, you won't earn any money on a day when there is no fish in the sea. The more you work, the more you earn on a day when there are tons of fish in the sea (assuming that the price of fish is constant no matter how much you sell them ... I apologize for my economist self). Working 8 hours everyday does not maximize your income. You need to work hard when you are lucky. You don't need to work at all when you are unlucky. Which will be the case tomorrow is uncertain, out of your control.
But I didn't understand this simple thing. I demanded a constant, steady flow of interactions with her everyday, which must have annoyed her a lot. If she reads this, I want to belatedly tell her that I'm very sorry for my immaturity.
If I'm asked, "If I met her today, then would I behave differently?" my answer is unfortunately no. To start a relationship, I need to have a sizable amount of time to stay together initially. Then we will learn about each other. Once I go through this period, then no matter how busy my partner is, I can trust this person and endure loneliness. If, from the beginning, we can't stay together at all, I can't go anywhere with this person.
Given that my life will be pretty much busy for the next six years, and given that I like a woman who is busy doing her work, this proves, at least partly, the impossibility that I will meet somebody soon.
This series "Proof of Impossibility Theorem" will continue irregularly.
Acknowledgement: This post is inspired by a blog post in Japanese on 7 July 2007 by Professor Fumio Ohtake, a labor economist at Osaka University.